Monday

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hey ssup. let me tell ya how's my feeling my miserable emotions. nah it's about being single. can you feel it after someone that always by your side disappeared just like that ? i mean you broke up with them ? can you feel that ? there's no one accompany you when you're around. i swear it hurts much that i can tell. i dont know how many more days i can be strong. i just want to talk to him, but the only contact has given me more pain and made it more obvious he doesn't feel the same way fuck !

I hate this ! I hate this so much (!)

I hate to break it to him but if our relationship didn't work out the first second times what makes you think it's going to work out the third or fourth times ? are you that noob much ? fuck. i know i already broke with him and im really sorry i did but you're still always in my mind and it's obviously killing me. im dying for the first time. nobody could feel it. i need to do it by myself. because nobody knows how hurts it feels. i tried so hard to forget about him but the thing is my mind keep thinking bout our happiness our crazy behavior our stupid dancing. and it goes on and on.

each time come to bed, it take 30+ minutes to sleep. cause i keep thinking bout him what is he doing this midnight ? did he miss me same goes to me ? and it sucks ! i dont know when it all will be over and over. i tried so hard to throw him but i can't. i lied to myself i lied to everybody that im just fine. i lied ! im just pretending that i was strong enough but no one knows that im dying inside i feel like i'd lost everything. you dont know how i face it alone i cried each day and it goes on and on. you dont feel it cause you are not in my place. you dont know how hard i had to face it alone. i just wanna cry and scream aloud !

i dont show my feeling to my friends cause i know i will be fine with them. but when it come to night, i feel like i wanna die. each time my friends asked me bout him, i answered without any sad voice and after that i ran from them and i cried. did you know that it hurts me so much ? i heard that he's with someone else a new gf can you feel the same way how i feel ? nah you dont. you dont know how terrible it was. i faced it by myself each day by each day and they rolled again.

let me tell ya, dont you dare say to me that i am not strong. i am strong enough with all those dramas. and dont you say to me that i was desperatos to him. nah the thing is you dont know how it feels cause you are not in my place. once you're in you will know how fuckin' terrible hurts it is

all i wanna do now is just have a vodka and everything will be fine. wanna try ? come let's party. enjoy your teenager's life. all those dramas will be end soon i believe that. aja aja fighting !

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